Have you heard …

As some items in this are continuing those of a previous entry, it is requested that the reader please first read “TODAY IN LIMERICKSVILLE.” Thank you. Now for the blank o’clock news.
Our rival Jon Stewart’s been fired.
He had not the graveness required
To properly tell
The news right and well
(They caught him before he retired).
Today [...]

A person was walking along
Singing a chipper-y song
When suddenly, ZAP!
He was gone, just like that!
Now, that didn’t take very long…
Today in Limericksville
A girl sat upon a high sill
And as she was falling,
She cried, “How appalling!
Her name, by the way, was Jill.
She was pushed by a large, husky guy
Who said she had eaten his pie.
It should [...]