I hate being a teenager
At the time that this is written, I have exactly 2.417 years left of childhood.
Time is running out, yet I have my whole life ahead of me at the same time. I wonder if this is what it feels like to die…
The teenage years are not a fun place to be, let’s just clear that up now. At this age, we are given independence, responsibility, a little extra leeway but not too much. We’re discovering who we are, what we believe, who our real friends are. We have sooo much planning to do, especially for the pursuit of a higher education and, eventually, a career. Add to this our raging hormones–drama, relationships, emotions flying all over the place–and, really, this is a pretty pivotal point in a person’s life. I wish we could graduate from child to adult, instead of simply overlapping the two in the years between twelve and twenty. I mean, technically we’re still children, but we’re budding adults as well, and I’m kind of realizing now what a short time I have left to be a child, even though it may be too late for that in some ways.
I miss being little. Several years ago (I won’t say “back then” because I’ll sound like I’m trying to seem older than I am), the decisions we made, actions we took, things we thought or said, had little long-term effect. We used to play school and house; now we’re planning for college, business, family. We had crushes, now we have boyfriends and girlfriends who may one day end up married. We were free to be curious about things and know others; now, there are things we’re expected–and, in fact, relied upon–to know, and other things that we shouldn’t know and wish we didn’t but do anyway. Any drama that occurred was soon resolved and was mainly between the people involved; today, things happen that people don’t forget, and that everyone who knows those involved is eventually going to know about. Where games and laughter were the currency of friendship, now gossip, drugs, and cliques are the binding of most social circles.
The Age of Innocence. It sounds like an era in history…
I Hate Being A Teenager.
I don’t know about you, but everyone at my school looks the same. Well, ok, that’s not entirely true. Every girl looks like every other girl and every guy looks like every other guy, that’s a fact. But the girls don’t look like the guys; that’s something, right? (Although, in all honesty, some of the guys are a leetle on the delicate side)… But it doesn’t stop at outward appearance. Everyone acts the same, too! We are a sphere of clones. How those of us who retain that last tiny crumb of authenticity of character don’t drown in this house of mirrors, I have no idea. All hearts are the same. All senses of humor are the same (although among girls and feminine guys I would define it more as “cuteness,” as opposed to being genuinely funny). Everyone who falls under the category of jock, anime-lovers, nerds, musicians, they’re all the same as everyone else pursuing that hobby. Everyone else is even more the same from not even having that one defining feature. I run into this problem a lot when I encounter Facebook LMS’s that involve posting things you like about people on their Walls. With a few people I know (mainly girl, I noticed) I have often had to squeeze, and sometimes invent, even just one unique thing to say to them. It’s a horrible fact, but it’s true, and I’m so very terrified that I’m becoming one of them. I try not to, but I find myself trying less and less; I don’t want to want to be a Teenage Girl, much less actually be one. I’m me. Not you. You’re you. Not me, or him, or her. I love this quote by I-don’t-remember-who: “Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.”
Well, my whole upper body is aching from laying on my stomach, so I’m going to go to sleep. I’m fairly certain I’ve said all I have to say on this subject for now. I’ll let you know if I discover something new. Good night my faithful reader (if I even have any of those)!
November 5th, 2011 at 6:45 am
Very well articulated. And now I wanna be a kid again too…:)