Have you heard …

Hi, I just thought that for the small time I have Internet on my iPod I shall make the most of it. Bye, now.
p.s. This is from November 12th, 2009.

(Note: Explained in Additions by Me. It is advised that the Reader first read “What nonsense 2 : )”, followed by “___ADDITIONS by Me”.)
And make sure that your fingers are attached to your hands and your toes are attached to you feet and your vomit is attached to your guts and…somebody just violated the safety [...]

Also, please be sure that your face is attached securely to your head.
Thank you.
————————————
You will also be provided at the doors with duct tape for your mouth and ears for prevention of the loss of guts.
NOTE: As you will be needing to breathe, we will not be held liable for any loss of innards through [...]

This is something I made up randomly yesterday…
Please keep all hands, arms and heads (if you are a mythical creature) inside the vehicle at all times, including while the vehicle is currently completely stationary. If you have heart, eye, or spinal ailments, and/or are sensitive to strobe lights or lasers, going on this ride [...]

Bonjour. Hola. Ciao. Hello. Ni-hao. Yeah, I’m just going to sit here all day saying hello in foreign languages; in a couple of them it’s the only word I know. I just noticed that I haven’t blogged since last year. Stop looking over my shoulder, you nosy person. [...]

I don’t know, but it’s been said Sarah’s thinker has been dead, but I really have to write, though no subject is in sight! Sound off, 1-2-3-4-1-2–3-4!
Blahblah blahblah blah, yammeryammer, and all that other good stuff…
Ho hum, dum dee dum diddle um dum.
Hmmmmmmmmm…..
Jessica, please unhand the phone. I mean now. Oh, whatever.
p.s. Jessica is my [...]

Rebekah and my now 6-year-old sister Alaynah have recently had a birthday. Alaynah had a water slide in the backyard which everyone including the older kids enjoyed…. Oh, and Bekah is getting a new camera. She seems to be delighted in the fact that it’s a little better than mine. Alaynah got a [...]

Here are some more famous smart-aleck “ha ha, you’re just saying that because you can’t say anything else” retorts that I have recently added to my superhuman vocabulary:
1. Congratulations.
2. Congratulations again.
3. I’ve noticed.
4. You’ve mentioned that.
Or if someone is being hypocritical and is in need of assistance realizing it:
5. Wait a minute, wasn’t it you [...]

No, it is not.
Originally my birthday party was to be on April 18th. We had to postpone it because most of my family was sick. Now I am still sick on the twenty-fourth and we have to postpone it to next Sunday. I ache all over, I have a cough and a [...]

Hi. Yeah, it’s true.